The Agitator evaluates the desperately-trying-to-sound-relevant Office of National Drug Control Policy’s contention that the only potential job that someone who indulges in marijuana is qualified for is “burrito taster,” and begins to compile a list of the successful, famous, self-admitted pot smokers in public life:

• Governor of California Arnold Schwarzenegger
• astronomer Carl Sagan
• mayor of New York Michael Bloomberg
• billionaire rock star/songwriter Paul McCartney
• Barack Obama, president-elect
• Bill Clinton, 42nd president of the U.S
• John Kerry, U.S. Senator and 2004 Democratic nominee for president
• John Edwards, multi-millionaire, former U.S. Senator, and 2004 Democratic nominee for vice president
• Sarah Palin, governor of Alaska, 2008 Republican nominee for vice president
• British Home Secretary Jacqui Smith, Transport Secretary Ruth Kelly, and and Chancellor Alistair Darling
• Josh Howard, NBA all-star
• New York Governor David Paterson
• Former Vice President, Nobel Peace Prize winner, and Oscar winner Al Gore
• Former Sen. Bill Bradley, who smoked while playing professional basketball
• Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, and former New York Governor George Pataki